More recently, I’ve been thinking about makeup. I’ve noticed most of the women around me, both friends and classmates, wear makeup to varying degrees. Duh, I guess you’d say, most women do. One of my friends has started wearing makeup and perfume with only the designer brands like YSL, Dior and Chanel. I’d start on the drugstore stuff myself, but I find myself worrying about the silliest things with makeup. Will I look like a clown? Will there be an obvious contrast between my face and my neck? Will it start sliding around my face when I wear lab glasses? (The latter two happen to my classmate’s foundation regularly. No, thank you.) I know my dad would make a fuss because my mum rarely wears makeup and he even did the whole ‘natural is the best beauty look’ thing on me when I put on black nail polish. Nail polish.
So mentally, I guess it’s more of a fear of how other people will react to it – I mean, I won’t be seeing my face all day, everyone else is. I would like to try experimenting with makeup; I have cheap eyeliner pencils, and the effect is less wow than I imagined. That is probably 95% due to my being an utter novice, and the 5% due to overexpectation.
I think it’s part of my overall buying-things-for-the-person-who-I-want-to-be. With which I will say, I will become that person. Either/or by buying less occasion things, or making use of the ones I have.